


The Mistakes We Made

by Naya_Writing



Category: The Dark Artifices Series - Cassandra Clare, The Shadowhunter Chronicles - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Fluff and Angst, M/M, Panic Attacks
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-15
Updated: 2019-08-15
Packaged: 2020-09-01 15:06:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,248
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20260069
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Naya_Writing/pseuds/Naya_Writing
Summary: Hiya guys! This is the first fanfiction that I have posted, so please give me feedback in the comments. Basically, the storyline is set 6 years after QoAaD. Kit has been living with Jem and Tessa training to be a Shadowhunter and is now leaving for his travel-year. Please feel free to leave comments and kudos. Thanks :)





	1. Destination

“Mina Carstairs! Where are you!”  
Kit thundered down the stairs of the Devon Institute. “I swear on the Angels Mina, if you have taken my witchlight, AGAIN, I will feed you to a Drevak demon!” he yelled angrily. Kit would never feed his baby sister to a demon, but he was furious just the same. He found the 6-year-old hiding in a cupboard shortly after; cradling the magic stone in her small hands. Kit sighed, his fury dissipating almost instantly, and crouched down to face her. “Mina… we’ve talked about this, have we not? That witchlight means a lot to me, so I would appreciate it if it didn’t go missing every week.” He chastised her gently. Mina looked up at him wide-eyed, innocently showing off her unnatural silver irises.   
“I’m sorry, Kitty” Mina whimpered. Kit’s heart melted slightly at the use of her nickname for him. When Mina was younger, she used to accidentally mistake Kit’s name for ‘Kitty’, which came into her vocabulary from Jem and Tessa when they were calling to Church- the household cat. “I just really wanted a witchlight too!” she added, adorably fidgeting with the stone. The door creaked open behind Kit slightly, revealing Tessa, his adoptive mother. Tessa was, in many ways, beautiful. With her dark hair cascading in ringlets down her back and eyes that sparkled even in the darkness of nights, Kit was proud to call her Mom. Mina had gotten all her good looks.   
“Mina, my darling” she started, “You can’t steal Kit’s witchlight. What would you think if Kit took something precious to you, say…. Mr Bunny?”  
“Not Mr Bunny!”  
“Exactly.”  
Mina’s eyes glassed over, as she gave the witchlight back to Kit, a single tear sliding down her rosy cheek. Her bottom lip trembled slightly,” I’m sorry Kitty!” she choked out. Kit’s heart lurched out for her, instantly forgetting his anger. He pulled her into a tight embrace, whispering soothing things into her golden hair over and over, just to try and get her to stop crying. An idea popped into his head.  
“Hey! What about this.” He broke free from the hug and turned to look her in the eye. “Why don’t we go to Diana’s to get you a witchlight of your very own, later. How about that?” he suggested, gently prodding her in the stomach as he said, ‘very own’. Even though Diana’s Arrow was in Alicante, where the Cohort was, Shadowhunters from the Clave-In-Exile had managed to secure that area, making it accessible to everybody. Mina nodded sniffling. 

“Does that sound good? Yeah?” Kit repeated, reassuringly.  
“Yeah...” Mina said, wiping her nose on her sleeve. Kit hugged her again, savouring the smell of her small-child sent. He would miss her so much.   
They crawled out of the cupboard, Mina running off in the direction of what he presumed was Church. He took a deep, calming breath, slowing his hammering heart. He opened his eyes and stared into Tessa’s glistening ones. She grabbed Kit by the shirt and yanked him to a crushing hug, startling him. Kit could feel her body heaving next to him; Tessa was sobbing into his shoulder.  
“We are going to miss you so so SO much Christopher! SO much…” she mumbled by his ear. He melted into the embrace, the familiar burning sensation of tears threatening to escape behind his eyes.  
“I know, I’ll miss you guys so much as well.” Kit breathed. More than you will ever understand. And yet he was still going.


	2. The Kitchen Talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a continuation of the previous chapter, but the Ty bit is set at the same time as when Kit is talking to Mina in the cupboard. Just to clear any confusion. :)  
The next chapter will be more exciting, I promise.

Kit wasn’t exactly sure why he was going to Los Angeles for his travel year. It had been a tennis game of arguing with Jem and Tessa. They said he should go “because its s great environment to live in for a while” Evidently forgetting that Kit lived there for 15 years of his life. He had countered that L.A was too traumatic for him. With his biological father having been ripped to shreds by demons in front of his very eyes, Kit had lived at the L.A Institute with the Blackthorns for a while.  
He had grown close to Livvy and Ty Blackthorn during his stay there, until Livvy had been brutally murdered- again infront of him- and Ty had forced-but-not-really-forced Kit to help try and resurrect her. During the resurrection he had confessed to Ty his true feelings for him, I love you, Ty. I love you. And with those words still in Ty’s mind, he had pushed Kit away and carried on with the spell, much to Kit’s exasperation. Upon accidentally resurrecting Livvy’s ghost, Ty had gone on to tell her that there was nothing without her by his side.   
Kit had taken it to mean that he fell into the nothing category and had left a few days later. It had caused him so much pain to leave the people he had grown so close to but he couldn’t stand being around them knowing that his feelings had just been carelessly tossed to the side and forgotten about. But the worse thing about it was he didn’t even say goodbye. He had just left. 

Of course, he couldn’t tell Jem and Tessa any of that when he arrived in Devon. Dabbling in Dark Magic was against Shadowhunter Law and Necromancy was forbidden everywhere. Instead, he had simply told them he needed a break from California when they had invited him to live with them. 

When they were persuading him to take his travel year (although 3 years late for an average Shadowhunter), they had told him that it was good to go back. “For clarification, if nothing else.” Jem had said, ever the wise one. Not that Tessa wasn’t wise. Goodness no. Both his parents were over a century old with a wealth of experience between them. But Jem had a way of convincing people when they needed to be convinced. Sometimes, like this particular occasion, it was annoying, because Kit knew he was right.   
So he packed his bags while Tessa called the Los Angeles Institute to let them know he was coming.  
“Are you completely ready?” Tessa said, pulling him back to the present. Kit broke free of the embrace and nodded. In the kitchen, he could hear Jem talking to someone. “Mom, who’s Dad talking to? In the kitchen?” he asked.   
Tessa smiled at him. “Oh yes, sorry I forgot to mention. Someone from the L.A Institute came to escort you there. You know, to make sure you get there safe!” She said brightly. Kit shrugged and made his way to the kitchen to say goodbye to Jem.   
“Dad! Hey, I just wanted to say goodb--..Oh…” he trailed off noticing the figure dressed in Shadowhunter gear. He had dark, tousled hair and extremely pale skin. But it was only when the man looked up to face Kit that he fully recognised him. The person standing before Kit had silver eyes. Not unlike Tessa’s sharp metal ones, but more of a softer, more calming grey. The man in front of him was none other than Tiberius Blackthorn. Ty. Ty. Ty…  
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Tiberius Blackthorn was standing in the Devon Institute’s kitchen talking to the former Silent Brother, Jem Carstairs when he heard loud stomping above him. He deduced that someone was running down the stairs in a rage. He heard shouting, following the elephant-like sounds upstairs. He heard with a jump, Kit yelling Mina’s name and something about a…Drevak Demon?? The noise -thankfully, as it was like glass to his brain- stopped. The conversation became quieter. Wanting to listen in, in case it was important, Ty asked, “Jem? Hey, sorry. Have you got any glasses?” Already knowing where they were (the Institute layout was the same) he walked over to the cupboard near the door and got out a crystal-cut drinking glass. Almost imperceptibly, Ty edged closer to the door. “That witchlight means a lot to me…” he heard Kit say, and “You can’t steal Kit’s witchlight” He also caught Tessa saying. Jem moved his chair so Ty lost most of what was said but snagged something about “Precious.” Why can’t Kit just replace the witchlight? They aren’t expensive. Ty thought to himself. Not unless… 

Ty pushed the idea from his mind roughly, not believing it even as he thought it. He turned back to Jem. “Is something happening outside?” Ty asked, smiling.  
“Mina probably stole Kit’s witchlight again, or something of the sort!” Jem replied chuckling. “Kit is very protective of it. It’s his first witchlight, so it holds some sentimental value. Jace must have given it to him.” He added.   
Kit. First witchlight. Protective. Jem’s words swirled in a dizzying storm inside Ty’s mind. He shook his head. “No.”   
“Pardon?” Jem asked politely.   
“No. Jace didn’t give it to him.” Ty cleared his throat. “I did. I gave it to him.”   
Ty was looking at the glass he was holding, so he didn’t see Jem’s face drain of colour. If he did, maybe it would have prepared him for what was to happen next.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will be released soon!! Remember to leave comments and Kudos, it would mean a lot!


	3. Breathe Kit, Breathe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a little bit angst so sorry for that...  
Anyway, in this chapter Kit is a weeee bit salty at TY and its quite frustrating. But.. push through it, and leave some kudos! XD

And there he was. The boy who had starred in all of Ty’s dreams for a solid 3 years straight. With his curly blonde hair and startling blue eyes, Kit sure had taken to maturity well. Ty looked down at his fluttering hands with embarrassment. He had trained his hands to not flutter when he was nervous, scared or angry, but Kit’s presence seemed to blow all that training out the window. Ty looked back up at Kit and saw his face soften. Kit stretched out his hand as if to take Ty’s shaking ones in his own but thought better of it and balled into a fist and withdrew it quickly. Ty’s gaze moved from where his hand previously was and up to his face, his eyes. His pupils were rapidly dilating and contracting, and his skin had turned a deathly grey. Kit stumbled back to lean on the frame of the door. 

“Kit?” Ty heard Jem asked behind him, “Are you okay?” Kit looked past Ty and at Jem. 

“I-I-I’m f-fine.” He stuttered, clearly not okay. 

“Are you sure?” Ty asked tentatively, stepping towards Kit slightly. Kit’s head snapped up at his words and he took a step back, away from Ty. 

“Why would you care?” Kit spat out, “You haven’t cared about me for 6 whole years. 6 years Ty! Even as teenagers with nothing really to lose, when you cast me aside, I felt like my world had ended, my LIFE had ended. But you didn’t care, no. You just used me for…” Kit trailed off before he could mention the resurrection. While he didn’t say all that he wanted to say, Kit’s words clearly hit their mark as he saw Ty recoil in shock. “I can’t. I-I-I can’t. I’m s-sorry Jem.” He panted.

He turned and stumbled up the stairs, his vision spotting so much he was nearly blind. He managed to get to his room before collapsing on the floor in front of his bed. Panting, Kit, tried to recall when we had last had a panic attack. It had been a few years ago when Mina had gotten sick and the doctors from Institutes all over the world were sure she wasn’t going to make it.   
But Tessa had been there, rubbing small circles on Kit’s back, calming him, helping him. No one’s here now for me. Kit thought. And it’s not like anyone will be there for me when I’m at the L.A Institute. 

Suddenly, Kit felt a light pressure on his back. He instantly relaxed and tried to look up at Jem or Tessa. When he looked into the eyes he saw staring intently back at him, filled with an unrequited love that Kit couldn’t quite place, he knew that the person helping him feel like he wasn’t going to die, was not either if his parents. But the one man that could afflict such emotions upon him and cause him to have such awful mental breakdowns. The one man who was the source of all Kit’s problems. He realised he had curled himself into the fetal position, so he got up hastily, wiping away evidence of tears he hadn’t remembered shedding.

Ty stood up stiffly from where he was crouching beside Kit. “I..I Je- Mr Carstairs wanted for me to find you and tell you that we will be leaving in 5 minutes if that’s okay?” He told Kit formally. “But if your having second thoughts about coming that’s okay too.” He added quickly.

“No. No. I-um... I’m coming.” Kit said, pushing aside the screaming voices in his head that he should shove Ty out the door and lock him out forever. Instead of actually doing that, Kit decided to do it mentally. He gathered up all the memories of Ty that had been haunting him for 6 years and shoved them inside an imaginary safe, completed with an imaginary lock and key. He then threw that key into an imaginary version of the Mariana Trench.   
Feeling accomplished, Kit grabbed his bag and made his way down the stairs, trying really hard not to trip down them because that would be really embarrassing. Why didn’t I do that sooner? He wondered. I feel…lighter!

_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________  
It could not move. But it could see, smell and sense. As the group of females went past, laughing, chattering, its pulse quickened. But it could not move.  
Yet.  
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no idea where this is going, so I don't know when the next chapter will be up. So bear with me for a while. REMEMBER TO LEAVE KUDOS AND COMMENTS!!!!!!!!!!! XD

**Author's Note:**

> Next chapter will be up soon!!!! :)


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